Packing Lunch

Tomorrow is Ethan's first day of first grade. As I packed his lunch and laid out his clothes for the morning, I found myself wanting to write. Not all the cute mommy blog things like how to pack a healthy lunch for 5 cents or less or organize it really well, but about the feeling behind packing him lunch and getting him ready for the next day.

When we told him it was time to come inside and eat dinner and get ready for bed he said "Yup, I have a big day tomorrow! I better get ready!" He has grown so much over the last year, and I realize I have too. I'm not normally the kind of mommy who cries when her kid goes to school, I have always loved school and have felt nothing but excitement for my kiddos and all the neat things they will get to do. This year feels a little different, though. It's the first year he will be gone all day long. I have never had to pack his lunch before, except for the occasional field trip day. I find myself wondering and almost worrying, where do I pick him up? What if I didn't pack enough for him to eat and he's hungry? What if I pack too much and he gets in trouble for taking too long to eat? What if he's tired at the end of the day? I always thought the mommies who wrote their kids notes inside their lunchboxes were kind of cheesy, yet I wanted to (and did) the same thing because I know I will be thinking about him throughout the day and I hope he thinks about me too. It's funny, I have been looking forward to school starting for weeks, and now that it's finally here I don't know that I'm ready for it. I'm going to miss that little guy.

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